Mom, Dad… I have fleas…

(Reads previous post and cringes.)  I’ve tried to hang on to my rage, but it fled about ten minutes after I published my rant.  I can’t stay angry for shit.  It takes too much energy for something that accomplishes nothing.  I worked on my quilt a bit earlier.  I’m hand quilting for the first time (though I wish I picked a smaller quilt.)  I understand why thimbles exist, now.  I discovered this after sewing through the top few layers of skin on my finger, (and wondered why my quilt was stuck to me.)  Still, no blood lost, though.  I’m using Wonder Woman flannel for the back, and black and white striped fabric for the binding.

I think drumming is improving my motor skills.  I don’t bother with the tools built in my module to test my timing anymore.  I get 100% every time now (which kinda ruined the fun.)  I think it’s intended for noobs who are learning drums as their first instrument.  Or people who don’t practice very often, perhaps.  I keep talking myself out of building my own drum module (and programming it not to suck.)  My brain won’t leave it there, however.  If I do that, I’ll want to sell it to others, which means I’d have to make it talk to Yamaha, Roland, Alesis, etc.  And that means coding for the proprietary hardware of competing companies.  (The horror!)  There, I just talked myself out of it again.

I watched Tina Fey’s Weekend Update segment.  I love her.  Oddly, it didn’t make me want cake.  (Probably because it got massacred hilariously.)  I lived in Boston while earning my Ph.D.  Watching 20k people show up to march today made me miss it.  It was incredible, and many pointed out they far outnumbered 45’s inaugural farce.  I hope they know their actions today healed some of the hurt, so many of us carry in silence.  I hope they know it made me so proud of them.  They are my America.  Sassy, bold, peaceful, and not having IT.  It led me to say something I haven’t in a while;  I love my country.

I spent much of the day doing chores and hanging out with M’s mom.  She braided my hair, (and it’s not tearful tight, yay.)  I finished Far From the Madding Crowd and began the last of the Thomas Hardy novels I downloaded.  Tess of the d’Ubervilles.  I’m going to read books by women authors for a while after this.  I need a break from the (Victorian era) misogyny.  I might give Ann Rice another shot since she’s mentioned in one of Stevie Nicks’ songs.  (Fan logic. 😂)  Five days and a wake up until Stevie Nicks performs in St. Paul.  😊

I learned some things when I watched her concert DVDs.  Turns out, they don’t do all the new songs on their latest album.  It surprised me, and I’m disappointed.  (Not terribly, though, as I’d still love to see her perform any song.)  The last concert I recall attending was DJ Jazzy Jeff and the Fresh Prince with JJ Fad opening.  (Supersonic 😂)  It was an outdoor concert, and when he began, Parents Just Don’t Understand, the crowd surged forward, and all of us up front got pushed under the stage for a bit, (at which point they stopped the show to let us out.)  It was 102° F, and his hip hop dancers were drenched in sweat and looked like they were on the verge of heat stroke.  They ended the show early to prevent that.  It was still cool seeing Will Smith, though.  I’m off to read.

“Nothing’s finer than being in your diner”?

Today has been good.  I’m catching everything the Depression Monster slings at me, and slaying it.  At this time next week, I’ll be in Denver.  I’m excited to go this time.  It’s odd, because I have a lot scheduled for a weekend trip.  Normally, I would feel anxious about having so much to do, but not this time.  I’m going on a Cannabis Tour that includes a visit to a grow warehouse, and lunch at a restaurant that specializes in curing the munchies.  Rice Krispie treats are an option for dessert, which is genius.  I haven’t gotten the munchies before, but I’ve also never turned down a Rice Krispie treat.  It’s a 4 hour tour, so there’s other stuff too.  There will be strangers, so it’ll be a good test to see if cannabis helps an Autistic person socialize more easily.

I’m going to base my results on whether or not I interact with anyone else on the tour, as well as how well I’m able to be among strangers for 4 hours.  Right now, it seems about 3 hours and 45 minutes too long.  Not terribly scientific, but it’ll at least determine if I should bother designing a more scientific test in the future.  If I remain with the group for the entire tour, I’ll call it a success.  If I remain for over 2 hours, it’ll merit a more scientific study in the future.  I know that right now, cannabis free, I would last about 20 minutes, and then get an Uber back to my hotel.  I would do this because it would shorten the length of time it will take for me to recover afterward.  If I succeed, it’ll take time to recover.  This is just how life with Autism is.  Social interactions with strangers are exhausting.

When I recover, I isolate as much as possible.  Then I hyperfocus on an activity until my cat or body object.  Rinse and repeat for however long it takes to feel recovered.  I don’t have data on how long it takes to recover because I refuse to measure the negatives.  I didn’t sleep last night.  I lay in bed and sang quietly while under my weighted blanket for a while.  I started to fall asleep, but Amelia Bedelia was batting her ball with a bell in it up and down the hallway at top speed.  It’s so cute how she really gets into it.  Her little butt wiggling just before she takes off is hilarious.  After hearing her do this a few times, I got up to play with her.  I’m powerless over her adorability.  Here she is on her “throne”.

It’s a pile of all my beginner quilts. They all have mistakes I made as I was learning.  I’m still learning, and still a beginner, but I’ve managed to overcome some of my past errors.  I got some new material through MassDrop for my next quilt.  I haven’t researched paper piecing yet.  I’ve been practicing my crocheting a bit.  I still suck at it.  It’s easier for me than knitting, though.  I’ve given up on knitting for now.  I don’t have enough hands, or something.

They’re real, and they’re spectacular.

I didn’t get much done today.  I mostly watched a Fixer Upper marathon on HGTV while goofing around on Twitter.  I did, however, get a strong recommendation for the new Adidas Ultra Boost running shoes.  I ordered some, along with a few other items.

I can’t wait to break the shoes in.  It got up to 62F yesterday, but dropped back into the 30’s today.  I had all my windows open when I went to bed, and it was 56F in my apartment when I woke up.  My cat was under the covers, so that should have been a clue.  I turned on the heat for a while after closing the windows.  Now it’s around 63F, right where I like it.  I’ve decided I’m not keeping this apartment when I move.  Yesterday, there was yelling in the parking lot of the building adjacent to mine.  There were police cars and a police dog apprehending someone who was shouting repeatedly that he wasn’t going with them.  It was scary.  This is the second incident involving police in a month or so.  When you add that to the cooking smells from whoever lives below me, it’s not worth maintaining.

I declined going to Denver this weekend.  I need some down time after NYC.  I’ll probably go this spring.  In the meantime, I’m going to work on a new quilt.  I’m going to do paper piecing, I think.  Once I find out what that is, and how it works.  I want to make a more traditional style quilt, but with modern fabric.  So it might require wearing sunglasses to view it, but I’ll still like it.  I finished the Cookie Monster quilt.

My lightsaber showed up in the photo, too.  I think it turned out fairly well.  I need to remove some specs of white from the color catcher I washed it with.  My stitching is a little off in places, but that was before I learned about measuring for my specific machine, not just the standard 1/4″.  The binding is black satin, and it’s the perfect size for the sofa.

Amy Lee of Evanescence released a new LP titled, Recover, Vol. 1.  I love it, and am going to listen to it on repeat until I fall asleep.  Again.  I can’t believe it as only about $4 on iTunes.  Granted, it’s exactly 4 songs.  But still, I would have paid way more.  I’ll probably buy it again on Amazon Music, just to support the artist.  It’s so good.