I figured I’d better do a bit of damage control after my recent ravings. I know many who read my blog are neurodiverse brethren who are younger than me, (literally, not the bullshit way allistic people measure age by time. I mean you who haven’t yet processed as much data as I have because your neural pathways are beautiful, and there are no shortcuts. Why use numbers to map a path never taken before? 😂) I’m assuming I freaked some of you out, and I’m hoping I didn’t trigger you closer to a meltdown. (Yes, I think all ND have them. Oops, you knew. My bad.)
Everything I said is rude. It’s not something I could have said to someone in a conversation, aside from the author of the letter. (That would have been borderline abusive.) I feel no shame for airing my feelings with wild abandon on the internet. I didn’t break any laws in America, even though you may have cringed as if I did. I’m sorry you couldn’t reach through the screen and figuratively punch me while you read it. It was uncomfortable to read; just as it was to write.
I share the way I do because life is terrifying for everyone. I don’t want you to miss any joy. I suspect we all get roughly the same amount, but the twisted, horrible part is, we usually don’t notice. We’re so preoccupied with licking the many, many wounds we collect along the way. I visualize this literally in my mind. We rarely look up to see the joy floating by. I’d love to see that as art, hint hint. 🙃 (Seriously, I’ll trade money for it. Take the risk and talk to me in comments about commish.)
I love it when I get a Life Skill hint from someone else. It’s like getting to move three steps forward in a single move. You may have seen me mention how floored I am by how many Life Skill hints Stevie Nicks shares, on occasion. (Heh, I can’t believe I typed “on occasion” with a straight face. I can deadpan now! I’m finally awesome! 💪🏽😂) My point: I drop them too because I love you. (Hope that didn’t make it weird.)
I know when I express rage my aim is so sloppy it’s offensive. I’m working on it. If I hurt you, I’m sorry. Look up. Here comes a hint. You’re incapable of rejecting a compliment/external encouragement. No matter how you feel about it, or react to it in real-time, the part of you that handles them accepts it at face value. The next three times you think of a sincere compliment to someone, I triple-dog-dare you to tell them. Secondary hint challenge: Sincerely complimenting, and encouraging those around you is nerve-wracking as hell until you start organizing the feedback data. (It’s why I’m ridic bold.) There is only, and will only ever be one you. That alone makes you (F-box button) incredible. Build on it just because you can.
Start right away, eh? It’s because sincere compliments and encouragements to people are like hybrid mattresses. They absorb and reflect back twofold, and sleeping on them is fabulous. (Shup, I’m analogy challenged. 😂) If it doesn’t click now, save it for later, it’s my best hint. It’s ghetto Prozac, and consequently, an excellent reason to maintain a friendship with a hip-hop enthusiast. Hip-hop builds you up. It’s why Slim Shady makes you feel giddy. You’re welcome. (Bonus.)
Guilt bonus for parents of autists because I’m hard on you: Autisms only cause is Nature. She’s just doing her thing, experimenting with the complexity of our species’ CPU’s. I suspect we might get multicore processing someday if we don’t ruin everything first. She’s the original and only scientist with authority on this planet, and we’re still at her mercy. Despite that, we’re in an abusive relationship with her, and you know it. Let’s all do some damage control, and work on it. Peace.
p.s. Lily, I’m merely not done yet, I haven’t forgotten. Thanks, you lovely lit geek. You’re awesome. 💜