“Elaine, bald men with no jobs, and no money, who live with their parents, don’t approach strange women.”

running

My body is changing.  The new workout regime has made me stronger quickly.  I didn’t realize it would affect the way I move.  I’m far less clumsy and more conscious of my body, even when not focusing on it.  My motions are fluid instead of choppy.  I take breaks to stretch throughout the day.  The signals my system sends when I need to eat or drink are getting through consistently.

I feel almost giddy when thinking about how quickly it’s happening.  I’m on the cusp of making another change.  I’ve given it lots of thought, and I’ve decided I’m not going to run anymore.  Instead, I’m going to walk.  I often mention I’m quite literal.  Sometimes, it’s best to strategize accordingly.  So I’m going to slow down.  I have Hypokalemia.  A month ago, I was dehydrated most of the time because the thirst signal rarely got through.

It meant often awakening in the wee hours with a charlie horse in a hamstring or calf.  It’s a shitty way to wake up.  I usually manage to work it out within a few minutes, but by then I’m sweating and almost crying.  When I was in uni, I got one in my hamstring while in the middle of an exam, once.  I managed to work it out without attracting attention, but not without a few tears.  That moment shows up in my nightmares, sometimes.  🤪

I’m walking around with the anticipation of both Beyoncé and Fleetwood Mac concerts in the future.  It’s a lot like skipping.  I’m regaining control over my attention span, which rocks.  I can watch TV again.  I caught up on The Big Bang Theory.  I still love it.  Chuck Lorre is a master at creating loveable, engaging characters.  The casting is superb as well.  You can tell the actors have the creative freedom to give their role dimension.

head rub

I forgive Rosanne.  My gut insisted.  Bill Marr pointed out the fact she’s mentally ill.  She’s not preventing her symptoms from harming others.  It’s a responsibility of all adults, but sometimes we fail at adulting.  It’s kind of why it’s a thing.  Most of us are trying our hardest to maintain, but we all struggle at some point.  Instead of being hurt by what she already said, I choose to hope she doesn’t repeat her mistake.  My gut,  my rules.  🙃

I cut off all my hair, today.  I’m catching up to Willow Smith.  💪🏽  I love that old soul.  Now that I’m working out for real, it’s become a hygiene issue because my hair is ridic thick.  The necessary daily hair washing only works when my hair is barely there.  Fortunately, I have a lovely shaped head (according to my mom.)  The bonuses include built-in air conditioning during the hottest summer on record, a drastic reduction in hair care product use, and my new favorite stim;  rubbing my head.  Yay.  I’m off to beat my drums with sticks.

 

“What was my father doing with a man in a cape?”

woman playing driving video game

It’s breezy today.  I like it.  A nice respite from too hot to go outside.  We didn’t have any band practice this weekend, so I’ve been bonding with my Playstation 4 and Xbox One.  (Not the Xbox One S, sigh.)  M still hasn’t let me try his new Xbox One X.  😂  The Call of Duty and Assassin’s Creed franchises aren’t for me.  Forza 7 looks fabulous, but I’m the worst at driving games.  If the object were to go the wrong direction and damage the car as much as possible, I’d rule, though.  🤭

I stick to puzzle games and pinball, mostly.  I’m getting good at pinball, (but I think my rank is in the mid 200’s on my best table.)  Not screenshot-worthy, yet.  Heh.  I’m enjoying Unmechanical, and Southpark:  The Stick of Truth today.  (Hearing Cartman drop F-bombs cracks me up.)  I tried one of M’s horror games on the PlayStation VR, yesterday.  It triggered a lot of ideas regarding VR’s potential.  (It also scared me so much I shook for a while after quitting.)

I’m low-level stressing out because I suspect M paid far more for my birthday gift than I his.  Something within me needs it to be even.  I know I need to talk about it with him, but I’m not looking forward to it.  I hate defending an irrational stance based on a gut feeling.  There’s a 99.99% chance I’ll bear a smirk against my will the entire time I present my case.  (Dammit, Face!  Do what I command!)

I can never play Spades, Poker, or the like.  At least not if the goal is to win.  I can think of at least two people who are still pissed off at me for accidentally reneging in Spades in the 90’s.  I think it might be an autism thing.  For me, it takes all available resources to mask enough to be at the table with multiple people in the first place.  Be amazed I only did it once and didn’t cut, don’t you know.  💪🏽  But I accept it’s not for me.  Now.  🙃

people gambling

 

I think I’m going to get M some new headphones.  There are a few by Focal I know he’d love.  Massdrop has three colorways available, but the black ones look incredible.  But my stomach hurts, so I think I’d better plead my pathetic case first, and talk to him.  (I keep my conscience in my gut, I guess.)  No wonder it tends to get more significant as we age.  😂

I can’t get enough of Solo by Clean Bandit ft. Demi Lovato.  I woke myself up from singing it in my sleep this morning.  Yep.  That’s me in the dictionary next to the word, doof.  👍🏽  In my defense, it’s a pleasant way to awaken.  Also, I love Demi Lovato.  (She’s a mental health advocate, too.)  I heard the Maroon 5 song with Cardi B earlier.  I was about to get mad when she finally started rapping.  If you’re going to ride her fame rocket for a boost, bring her in right away.  That’s all I’m saying.  🙃  I’m off to play Skylanders.

 

“Maybe his dogs heard about how you tried to kidnap that other dog.”

kids playing

Some things.  While pulling an unbelievably tasteless publicity stunt, throwing shade on the memory of our beloved Queen, Whitney Houston, Kanye West died of thirst (in my world.)  His epitaph:  Kanye West Didn’t Care About Black People.  Rest in Peace just rest.  Also;  Rosanne who?  Further, it’s disturbing these stories got far more news coverage than the approximately 4,645 American people who died in Puerto Rico during the aftermath of hurricane Maria, under 45’s blatant incompetence.

Welcome to America, where Teen Vogue is a remarkably more accurate and trustworthy source of news than Fox News.  By a long shot.  I mean, holy shit.  One of these kids is doing its own thing.  Come on, can you tell which one?  (Remember when Sesame Street taught us noticing the weird kid was a fun game? 🤫)

Finally, I think it’s time to bring back the FCC Fairness Doctrine, after reasonable updates to reflect the times.  Especially for the Big Four networks, and all over-the-air stations.  I think it’s time to make enforcement of the revised document mandatory, too.  Fox News makes it necessary.  I’m hoping some most excellent attorneys figure out how to sue the shit out of Rupert Murdoch and his evil company to get things rolling on that.

My gig went well.  I think I finally understand why people seek fame.  I’ve never paid attention to an audience when performing in the past.  I noticed the likes are far more impressive in person than online.  So much, I can see how they could be considered addictive.  Fame wouldn’t touch me with a 10-foot pole, but I’m glad to realize the appeal.  I usually want to know the why about things.  I’m off to see a lizard (nature documentary.)  ✌🏽

“An overdue book from 1971? This is a joke, right?”

The Outsider, by Stephen King

I finished reading, The Outsider, by Stephen King.  I read it over the course of two days because it wouldn’t leave me alone.  Stephen King is just showing off at this point.  He’s cracked the passwords to our private fear vaults, and rifled through that old shit we only think about in nightmares.  Then he baited the novels hook with psychological crack.  Even the artwork on the cover got me.

I didn’t get much sleep between readings.  At least not the type that leaves me feeling rested.  I had vivid stress dreams, but couldn’t remember them when I awoke.  My usual trigger of being stuck in an impossible-to-survive situation, no doubt.  Despite this, I’m glad I read it.  It will take some pondering time to nail down what I gained from the book, but I suspect it’s a better understanding of people.

Before The Outsider, I read The Plantagenets: The Warrior Kings and Queens Who Made England, by Dan Jones.  I learned a lot, and am surprised how much I enjoyed it.  It’s closer to a textbook than I usually read for pleasure.  (I heard the narration in the voice of Robin Leach because the author was also delightfully snarky.)  I’m such a doof.

curious kitten

I also produce the movie of whatever novel I’m reading in my head as I go.  I pick the cast using famous actors I favor.  Usually, Lupita Nyong’o, Charlize Theron, Rosario Dawson, Regina King, and Natalie Portman are in everything.  So are Denzel Washington, Tom Hanks, and Matt Damon.  Excellence is like play-doh.  You can mold it to any form.  And I still suck at analogies.  🙃

Now I’m reading a hilarious novel titled, The 100-Year-Old-Man Who Climbed Out the Window and Disappeared, by Jonas Jonasson.  It reminds me of Forrest Gump, so far.  It’s going to get me in trouble for laughing so hard after 11 PM.  I’m surprised by how (emotionally) uninvested I am in the characters while still enjoying it so much, though.  It’s likely to change as I read further.  (I hope.)

I’m guessing there’s a hidden symbolic character sucking up all my likes.  As much as I read, I don’t think of myself as a lit geek, because it takes me a while to recognize all the cool stuff in well-written novels;  like irony and hidden symbolic characters.  Let’s blame it on saccharin.  🤫  My band has a gig tonight, so I’m trying to fend off that bitch, Anxiety.  I’m winning, but the adrenalin is still releasing against my will.  I’m relying on the likelihood, whatever happens, will probably seem funny at this time tomorrow.  💜

“So, you’re still master of your domain.”

Adidas Alphabounce Em

It’s hot today (86° F.)  The outdoor pools opened and are already busy.  I’m happy because I’m wearing my new running shoes.  Adidas Alphabounce EM’s.  They’re fabulous and bouncy.  They also make me an inch taller.  Bonus.  New sneakers bring me so much joy.  Props to Adidas;  the quality is impressive.

I can’t wait to break them in.  I’m changing up my fitness routine.  Running alone isn’t a sufficient exercise regime for me.  (I’d have to run a lot faster and farther for it to suffice.)  It’s more a stim with minor cardio benefits.  I’m going back to what Jane Fonda taught me, (because she’s 80 now, and she could probably kick my ass.)

 

High-impact aerobics is the best workout I’ve discovered so far.  It’s a full body workout in an hour.  It includes music and dance-like movements, which make it fun.  It sucks at the beginning because it’s 45 minutes of cardio similar to running at 75% speed, 10 minutes with weights, and 5 minutes of stretching.

My 5-miles a day runs at whatever pace I feel like running won’t save me from huffing and puffing my way through the first few sessions, (at least.)  I plan on using my marathon stick often to prevent soreness.  I have one for my feet, too.  I remember how fantastic I felt when I was at my peak fitness level.  I’m going back there to stay.  Bring it, menopause.

It helped so much when I was in school, too.  I’m planning to take a writing course next semester.  Now that I’m writing a novel, I want more information, and I have questions.  None of my previous coursework dealt with things like character development.  Most of what I know is from being a voracious fiction reader.

Aside from feeling like I don’t know what the hell I’m doing, the writing is going well.  The novel I’m creating is series of interrelated short stories of a speculative fiction nature.  I’m having fun in the process.  I write for a while, then sit on my balcony and think for a bit, with a little pacing in the mix.  It seems to be my method.  I’m off to band practice.  ✌🏽