“Here’s to those who wish us well, and those who don’t can go to hell.”

All who live carry luggage on their journey

I realize I don’t explicitly discuss autism on this blog very often.  It’s because I’m autistic; it’s an intrinsic part of my perception and life, as is PTSD, and my ongoing battle against depression.  On my journey to becoming my best self, I encounter many allies who share their experiences and understand every aspect of my struggles.  Some are also autistic, but many carry luggage with different labels.

I’ve learned to apply caution when inviting others into my world.  It’s a painful, repetitive lesson.  I’m aware of other autistic people who choose to be hateful while gleefully invalidating those who don’t have a formal diagnosis.  (As if the medical community has even managed to produce definitive criteria that can pass a casual bullshit test.)  I’ve encountered people with mental or physical illnesses who decide to be mean and spiteful to others for who and what they are; as if it’s something anyone can control.  Their pain hasn’t yet taught them of its presence in the lives of all who live.

In hindsight, I’m always embarrassed by my naivetè.  I admit I once assumed marginalized people automatically possessed a more profound understanding and compassion for those who also suffer.  It’s brought me a great deal of pain as I recognize my mistake.  Going forward, I hope to be wiser.  It hurts so much to know there are people on this planet with whom I must guard my heart.Humans are diverse

I still feel like a new member of the autism community, years after discovering the online fellowship:  especially now that I’ve seen the pettiness and hatred spewed between members.  The irony is particularly disturbing;  autistic people who shun other autistics for being different than themselves in their challenges and experiences.  😲 🙄

I remember when I was thrilled to learn about neurodiversity and finally recognize my tribe.  I’m sad to realize it’s not as inclusive as I once thought. I remember how lonely I was, and I didn’t expect alienation from fellow aliens.  Nevertheless, I’m incredibly grateful for those who do accept and support me.  I cherish the love and fellowship of others also journeying on the path to their best selves.  It matters not to me what baggage or labels others carry, so long as they walk with kindness, compassion, and sincerity.

I’ve learned it’s easy to embrace diversity among humans.  I celebrate it.  It enriches my life, stretches my mind, and strengthens my spirit.  The smallest bit of effort ensures I can relate to anyone I choose.  No matter how we’re different, we’re all human.  We’re all incredible individuals who decide what we will become through our choices.  Thanks to those who help me grow. 💜  listen up

Thirty-three days until the Fleetwood Mac concert! (Performs the pre-choreographed dance routine.) 🙃✌🏽

Delayed P.S.  I’m sorry I said money is the only god on this planet.  It’s been eating at me ever since, but I only just figured out it’s also why I haven’t been able to sleep.  I’m sorry.  💜

13 thoughts on ““Here’s to those who wish us well, and those who don’t can go to hell.”

  • A good lesson to learn. Sort of seeing/hoping to see yourself in others… Then finding out there are bitter,negative people in all sorts of spectrums. Being positive and seeing positive is a good thing . Doesn’t happen by itself , hope you continue to find more of your people .

  • I love how positive and uplifting this post is despite talking about some negative issues. You’d think people would be understanding towards people who share their struggles, but bitterness is a powerful force. Sometimes (at least in my experience with other FA’ers), it seems like people have embraced the glass-half-empty outlook and thrive on pettiness and putting others down.

    This sentence is wonderful–“It matters not to me what baggage or labels others carry, so long as they walk with kindness, compassion, and sincerity.” If we could only step back and see that, whatever baggage we carry, we have common ground in that we are all travelling…♥

    • Thanks, Lily. I learn so much from your example. You’re the only one I know of who spoke up (in your blog) about the futility of blaming God for pain. Even though I made a terrible, hurtful comment that invalidated the faith of so many, you didn’t hurt me back. Instead you showed me what I was doing and where that path led; nowhere I want to be.

      Thanks for being so gentle, kind, and forgiving, and not abandoning me in darkness. It’s so much easier to turn away from the lost; when one does the opposite it’s powerful. You know I don’t understand Christianity, but despite this, I recognize when someone treats me like I believe Jesus would. Love you, young one. 💜💜

  • “I still feel like a new member of the autism community, years after discovering the online fellowship: especially now that I’ve seen the pettiness and hatred spewed between members. The irony is particularly disturbing; autistic people who shun other autistics for being different than themselves in their challenges and experiences.”

    This, so hard!! 👏👏👏. Been there, done that, hardly ever on social media as a result 👍 Best thing for me really, but that doesn’t mean it did hurt or suck at the time. I’m so sorry that I’m not alone in this experience. Why TF must some people in the AS community treat other AS peeps like this?? Seriously, AS of all people should know better, should know how hard we tend to have it in everyday life. Isn’t life tough enough being the 1% without an AS-civil war besides? And how do those people have the leftover energy to even snipe at others? I sure as hell don’t. My experience tells me that there’s Other Stuff going on with many of them, and I’m not even sure all of them are even AS, but that’s just Me Being Blunt and if anyone asks you didn’t hear it from me (lol) 😉😉😘❣️ Anyway, standing strong with you, Sister, in a drama/BS-free world 🙌😘💞

    • Oh, Laina, I’m so proud of you I’m bawling (my typical reaction to any powerful feeling. 😂) I love being your big sister so much. I love seeing you let out some of the rage at being horribly treated in this safe space. It’s infuriating! Rage is precisely what it evokes in me too! It’s dangerous to suppress, so yay for letting it go. So valid! (hugging you tightly) Mwah! 💜💜💪🏽👍🏽✌🏽💜💜😍😘

      • Awww shizz, girl 🤗🤗🤗. Do you have any idea how mutual the feeling is and how you just brightened a big-arse smile across my face just now? 😍 You probably do, just because you’re that brilliant and feeling and I totally love you girl, which is something I don’t say frivolously; I have to really mean it 😘 Rage on and let it go indeed! 🙌🙌. Hugging you reciprocally, always, Wiser Sister of mine 🤗❣️ 🌈🌟🌈

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