“I don’t know. Last time, I got the tap.”

Humans, the game.

I’ve been speculating about a pre-life scenario in which we choose our families before we’re born.  Sometimes, I wonder if this is the case for me.  It seems to me my life was specifically designed to aid in rejecting hate.  I suck at hating people.  I literally can’t do it for very long.  It’s like having a bug in your nose.  You divert all energy to removing it as quickly as possible.  Nothing else matters until it’s gone.

Hating takes a lot of resources.  It also has a lot of unfortunate side effects.  Like premature aging.  (There’s a reason people associate oldness with intolerance.)  Also, hate makes people ugly.  Dogs and toddlers react to hateful people instinctively.  That’s a lot of detectors.  If your dog is wary around someone, you notice, right?  Same with small children.  It’s a survival mechanism.

I’m glad I suck at it.  I’m pretty sure I’m as bitter as it’s possible to be about racism, without becoming racist.  Everything I’ve experienced and witnessed so far reinforces the fact we’re all the same.  Skin color is no more significant than eye color.  Whether you exist on soil A or soil B matters not at all.  What matters is what you do with your avatar.

We have varied interests; our characteristics shaped by our ancestors.  What we experience, process, and reflect upon affect how we perceive the world.  But we’re all the same, too.  There are no differences that make one group more or less worthy of life than another.  The groups are only significant because we make them so.  We react to our subtle differences as if we’re pre-programmed to encounter aliens at some point in the future, (or as likely in the past.)

We’re little creators.  We create our world and everything it holds, then create stories about ourselves and our lives and exchange them.  I’m hoping for aliens in the very near future (because I’m exasperated by racism, and I think it would put things in a more realistic perspective.) Hating brown skin will seem silly when the green guys with three heads show up, don’t you know.  It might be the only thing that makes all of humanity cherish all of humanity.

I wonder if I chose my family because I knew living on a planet with 7 billion or so others would at least require tolerance of others.  Tribalism doesn’t work with billions of people on one earth.  It’s a straight path to species annihilation, which I hope isn’t the goal.  I hope whoever programmed this game we call life included numerous scenarios in which humans exist in future expansion packs.  I’d like to think the next update will be Humans: Post-physical Shenanigans.  It’ll be like the internet on steroids.  😂

5 thoughts on ““I don’t know. Last time, I got the tap.”

  • Bravo! Great post. Holding hate is an extraordinary waste of precious energy.

  • I really enjoyed this! I really do love your writing and your thought-trains and how they wander into beautiful spaces 😍 I have often thought along these lines, the whole choosing your family thing. People say you don’t choose your family and maybe that’s true in terms of what we consciously know in this life, but maybe we did play a major role in it long beforehand, so that it’s a done deal once we get here 😊 I think we probably choose our main themes in terms of lessons to learn and stuff, too 😁 I think it’s cool that you can’t really hate people. I’m with you – it takes too much energy and it makes people ugly. This happened to my cousin’s wife–she would be so beautiful except that she’s been too bitter and resentful for too long, and there’s this perma-sneer etched onto her face. Weird, but true 💗 So, I definitely think you’re onto something and that the world would be a better place if more people thought the way you do! 👏👏👏👏👏

  • Yeah, I’m unable to sustain anger, hate, bitterness and similar emotions. I can get furiously, incredibly angry and if I don’t keep it locked down can lose normal restraints on what I say, but as soon as the physical adrenaline rush subsides, maybe 20-30 minutes at most, the anger just washes away. And I often see and understand why people who hurt me acted the way they did. It doesn’t excuse it, any more than I make excuses for times I’ve acted poorly, but it’s even harder to hate when you understand, at least in part. I also never really had anyone who wasn’t in some way damaged or problematic. If I hadn’t been able to accept and learn the good they offered amidst the hurt and pain and bad, I wouldn’t have had much of anything from which to learn helpful things.

    In a way, I did choose part of my family. I had to do a lot of things when I was 10 to get my biological father out of my life and acquire a new adopted Dad. He’s never been perfect and came with a host of issues, but he was a definite upgrade. And I’ve lived near him my whole adult life. He’s also probably the main reason I made it through the 10-16 year old years.

    Despite everything, I wouldn’t choose a different family or life. I wouldn’t be me and my children and grandchildren wouldn’t exist. I like that they exist.

    Peace. I love your posts.

  • Well said, Scott. I think it’s so cool you were your own hero at such a young age. Thanks for reading. 💜

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