I miss running daily. I can resume on Friday, but that seems a long way off right now. I’ve been compensating for the inevitable attempts by The Depression Monster to derail me by rocking, while listening to songs I used to run to when I was a teenager. The power of music to evoke vivid memories fascinates me beyond words. It’s been quite comforting. I’ve mostly recalled scenes and sounds from past running routes. My route on Fort Bliss, in El Paso brought back a lot of memories from that time in my life.
It’s made me really appreciate the fact that my routes are now completely on bike trails, which means no exhaust fumes. I’ll be very tempted to do a long run on Friday. It’s cooled off considerably, but the adult in me is advising caution. My inner child, (the smart-ass who strongly suspects that life as we know it is actually an astonishingly advanced game of The Sims), is pushing for a 10 mile run, followed by a bubble bath while eating chocolate cake. Yeah. I’m going to go with option 2.
I ordered a new desk online the other day. It’s a powered sit/stand desk with a bamboo top and a black C-frame base. I got the 72″ version to accommodate both my gaming setup and my Mac setup. I’ll be using a 32″ curved Samsung monitor with AMD FreeSync for my gaming setup, and a 27″ Dell Ultrasharp for my Mac mini. Unfortunately, my Mac mini isn’t working right now. It boots up, but won’t talk to my monitor. I tried to troubleshoot it by changing the DisplayPort to miniDisplayPort cable, using an HDMI connection, and a different monitor. Nothing. But the good news is that I purchased AppleCare this time. It’s less than a year old, so I’m still within the original warranty, but only by a little over a month.
I suspect it’s something I could fix myself, but since I have AppleCare, I won’t bother. I’ll take it to a local authorized repair shop this weekend, because the hacker in me won’t let it out of my sight while my hard drive is still in it. It’s not that I have anything illicit on my hard drive. I just try to practice good security. Besides, I’m such an airhead that I might not notice a stealthed keylogger, or similar. Also, it amuses me that I’m hypervigilant with my data security, because I don’t really have anything worth hiding, (that isn’t already encrypted). Overkill FTW!
I also got some accessories, and one of those anti-fatigue mats. The monitor is VESA mountable, fortunately. I haven’t decided yet if I’ll use a single mouse/keyboard for both setups, but that would probably be ideal. My speakers are Kanto YU5’s, so they’ll connect to both systems via Bluetooth, but I’ll probably just use my headset for my gaming computer. I’m excited to get it all set up. I’ll try and remember to take photos when I’m done. I’ll be moving it with me to Denver, along with my filing cabinet and my armless Tulip chair. My nephew wants my recliner, so that’s going too. The rest of my furniture will be given away to whomever gets it out of here.
I had therapy on Monday this week. My therapist was cracking up when I told her about the last time I moved, about 5 years ago. I got rid of most of my stuff then too, and began by having a garage sale. However, I suck as a salesperson, and after a few hours of anxiously talking to the strangers who came by, I hung up a sign that said, “If you want it, take it”. It worked. By the end of the day, everything was gone, including the tables they were displayed upon. I watched a steady stream of people carrying things away from a window for a bit. I was just glad to see it go.
I’m kind of amazed by how much stuff I’ve acquired in the 5 years since. I really need to stop with the geek subscription boxes. It’s basically lots of junk I’d never otherwise purchase, plus one or two things a month that make me squee. And a black or grey t-shirt each month, because apparently those are the approved colors in the geek uniform. It’s nice to get a surprise package in the mail each month, but I’m going to find one that uses the same model with candy. That way I can go one step further, and be a consuming consumer. Sigh.
I’m going to adopt a minimalist lifestyle in Denver. I’ve already made the transition. It’ll just be far more evident when I get rid of all my excess stuff from before I outgrew vapid consumerism. I’m going to use my money to amplify my values instead. More specifically, to strategically help a few people. Veterans, disabled people, and those who just need a small boost to vastly improve their circumstances. I’m going to do some research, and find out where I can make a positive difference in the lives of others, instead of accumulating a lot of stuff that will only end up owning me.
Therapy is having a powerful effect on me, and it’s happening quickly. It’s changed my views on psychology, for one thing. I’ve seen it’s effectiveness firsthand, and I’ve realized that part is due to having a really good therapist, but an even bigger part is due to my willingness to listen, comprehend, and apply what she teaches me. It’s not easy. Usually, I want her to figuratively hold my hand for every difficult step I take, but my desire to meet a challenge by myself is far stronger. I’m already addicted to her giving me positive feedback. She’s totally like a SGT about it, too. She does it sparingly, but when I most need to hear it. Yesterday, she told me she liked the progress she sees in me, but also made it clear that I have a way to go yet. It made me laugh in reflection because it reminded me of how my brother Steve used to give me the bigger cookie, but lick it first.