Wakefulness

I’ve had a busy few days.  I set up my new guitar, and had a blast playing the shit out of it.  One thing they don’t mention about women who play string instruments;  we keep our hands moisturized, so the calluses from playing don’t get as tough as say, a lead guitarist in a touring rock band.  For me, it’s habit.  I would have dry skin if I wasn’t an avid user of moisturizers.  It’s been part of my routine since I was a child.  It would be less painful to play for hours at a time if I allowed my fingertips to become hardened by permanent calluses.  But that won’t be happening.  Just typing this has resulted in my getting up to moisturize my hands.  Back with soft hands.

My cat has decided she’d like to help with the rest of this post.  As soon as she gets done knocking everything off my desk.  Ooh, she left the mouse alone.  Okay, she’s settled in my lap.  The Cable Guy is on.  This is such an underrated movie.  I love it.  It’s dark humor, well acted.  Jim Carrey really commits.  It’s not Big, but it’s still good.  Almost Groundhog Day good.  I’ve been wanting to watch some anime today.  Not the Studio Ghibli stuff.  Maybe Keano’s Journey, or Mushi-Shi.  Then perhaps I’ll work on a new song.  I’ve slept well for 2 consecutive nights.  It’s nice.  I didn’t have to start over a single time in the shower.  So this is awake… I quite like it.

I have a friend on Twitter who’s cool about answering some questions that have been floating around in my mind.  I was so relieved.  I didn’t think it through fully, however.  I asked a few questions, and she answered both well.  Her answers also answered questions I hadn’t asked.  Bonus.  I pondered the new information.  Again, relieved.  There are so many things I’ve heard or read that I don’t understand as fully as one would expect, based on the amount of knowledge I’ve collected.  It’s not that I don’t pay attention.  I do.  I just store unknowns until I can do some research.  The problem is that when I do my research, I get sidetracked.  The internet is as great a tool as it is a distraction.  So some things, usually the ones I’ve read but never heard, get low priority in triage.

Therefore, there are words I’ve read, that I don’t know how to pronounce, and sometimes have nothing more than a clue about it’s meaning.  An example that shows up in my nightmares often is when an MP asked me if I was forcibly sodomized.  I understood forcibly.  I had read the word sodomy before.  In the bible.  But bible didn’t define it.  I got from the bible a negative connotation.  That was the only time it ever came up.  I melted because I couldn’t answer the question, had wicked jet-lag, and just wanted my Mom.  I was having my second worst life experience, the first being when I visited Dachau.  It was when I first realized how vulnerable I am.  I want to say, was.  But typing about it has made my mind begin to go numb.

I have more questions for my friend.  I’ll ask later or tomorrow.  Depending on if the sleep streak continues.  My phone will be here soon.  My former phone was located in my nephews sofa, between the cushions.  I told him to hang on to it.  I’ll remove it from my present contract.  I’ll use it when I move.  I’ll have to find out which company is good in Denver.  I’m looking forward to having more options.  I’m going to go run before all the resolutionists show up and hog the treadmills.

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