Weed For Autism

I’m home.  I had a lovely time, but I’m so glad to be home.  My cat made loud, long meows when I came in.  Like she was saying, “Just where in the hell do you think you’ve been?  I’ve been waiting for you to come back, and started to lose confidence.  I ransacked your kitchen as a demonstration of my anxiety.  Don’t even think about finding a remote control anytime soon.  And you know that place you always insist I get down from?  Been sitting there for hours.  And here you come, walking in like you own the place.  Not to mention you forgot to leave the heat on! It’s freakin’ 61 degrees in here!  You. Are. Grounded!!”

Or something like that.  She opened my freezer and left it open.  My popsicles were warm liquid when I discovered this.  I tossed them, shut the door, and it kicked back on.  I imagine my electric bill will reflect this.  But the worst part of getting home was the fact that it was bitterly cold and windy.  And dark.  And I was unable to find my car in the long term parking lot.  They all looked the same while covered in a foot of snow.  I walked about in search of it for about 10 minutes, during which time I cursed myself for not bringing a hat.  Then my face and ears felt like they were on the verge of frost bite, so I went back into the airport.

I sat down and waited for my face to defrost.  I wanted to cry, it was so cold.  At one point, I started thinking I wouldn’t be able to make it back inside.  But that was just Anxiety talking.  She’s such a bitch.  After warming up, I went back outside to the one and only remaining taxi.  I asked the driver if he would drive me around to look for my car, (out loud!!!).  We negotiated that I would pay him $10 plus parking fee to do so.  We drove about, but it was too dark.  I didn’t find it.  So instead, I asked him to take me home.  He flipped on the meter and took me home.

I didn’t get high yesterday because I didn’t want to be compromised while in public.  But the lingering effects are noticeable.  For one, I normally wouldn’t have gone up to a parked Taxi and talked, (out loud mind you) to the driver.  It was the first time I’ve spoken out loud in weeks.  I wasn’t freaking out while this was taking place, either.  I was thinking only of my mission to get home.  While riding, I normally say nothing to the driver.  This time, I initiated a conversation.  ME!!  I asked him if he’s lived in Sioux Falls for long.  This was a safe assumption because he was black and had an obvious accent.

He told me he’s lived here for 2 years, and that he loves it.  He has 2 kids, and feels it’s a great place to raise children.  He told me that prior to moving here, he lived in West Philly for 10 years.  And yes, during the rest of our conversation, I heard The Fresh Prince of Bel Air in my mind;  “West Philadelphia, born and raised, on the playground is where I spent most of my days.”  That made me laugh internally.  I thanked him, gave him a decent tip, and went inside.  I checked my mail, and inside was a nice, new,  warm hat I ordered.  I laughed instead of crying, and got on the elevator.

I’ve since unpacked, and opened the big gift waiting for me since I left.  It’s a beautiful new electric guitar.  It’s a dark blue, almost purple.  I’ll post photos later.  Then I read for a bit, and went to bed.  I slept hard.  My cat has been glued to me since she finished going off.  She’s very happy today, which is fun to see.  She’s been steadily purring since then too.  I think she may have worried I had abandoned her.  Poor baby.  I don’t think I’ll be able to leave her for days again.  Next time, I’ll get my doctor to transform her status to medical companion, or some shit.  Then I’ll take her with me.  I saw a woman playing with a cat in the Denver airport.  The carrier was sitting open on the floor, and she had a harness and leash on the cat.  The cat was all black and beautiful.  I wanted to go over and play too, but I refrained.

My cat is too loud for commercial travel.  I mean, normally she’s quiet and sweet.  But when she’s not happy, she yells and carries on.  It would be too stressful.  I’ll think about it more another time.  I need to call a Taxi to take me back to the airport to find my car.  I’ve decided I’m going to do that tomorrow.  I didn’t feel like it today.  It’s stupid cold with the wind chill.  Actual temperature is 6.  But with windchill, it’s -17.  No wonder I thought I was going to freeze, walking around without a hat on.  But I didn’t get frostbite or anything.  I like the cold, but only when I can dress for it.

I’ve always thought that my Army training made me a little bit intimidating to strangers.  I guess I just figured it was an automatic thing once you learn to kill effectively.  I was wrong.  In fact, I must be the opposite.  People kept talking to me.  Kids kept sitting beside me, leaning ON ME, watching me play on my 3DS.  Their parents didn’t seem at all concerned.  One told her kid to stay there while she went to the bathroom!  She went, returned with food, and still didn’t mind her son all up in my game.  I kept playing, and was reading a lot of prompts to understand what was going on in the game, when the little boy started hitting the button to get past the text.  He was probably too little to read well, and didn’t want to wait.  I laughed and let him.  Then I looked up and noticed 2 more kids, one who then started to lean over my back while standing on the seat behind me.  I laughed again.  Then I held the game up and looked at them.  This is the universal sign for, “Who’s next?”.

The kid who was still trying to figure out how to get the best watching angle snatched it out of my hand and stared at the screen for a moment.   Then quietly, without looking up, said, “Mine because I couldn’t see”.  Kid logic.  Then he looked at me and smiled.  I laughed again.  The other 2 were rearranging to get the best view.  I instinctively wanted to pull out my PS Vita and start playing that, but I caught myself.  We migrated to the floor and continued taking turns.  Then one of the planes came in and a bunch of people started walking in from off the plane.  Then 2 out of 3 of the kids were gathered up to leave.  The remaining kid was having his turn, and without looking up, asked me which Pokemon games I have.

I shuffled through my cartridges and lined up my Pokemon games.  He tapped the ones he has.  It tickled me to recognize that since I wasn’t talking out loud, he decided not to either.  I love this about children.  He switched games to Pokemon X.  We played until our plane started boarding.  Then afterward, he sat with me on the plane, along with 2 little girls.  I looked around, and yep.  Every kid on the plane was sitting with me.  This isn’t the first time this has happened.  I think this means I’m not intimidating at all.  I figure since I don’t and won’t be having any children, the least I can do is allow a parent to use the bathroom in private once in a while.

We’re supposed to get more snow, so I’d better go get my car tomorrow morning.  I’ll have to dress warm.  Owning a white car sucks right now.  I hate that part of me wishes I could just abandon the car and start with a new one.  I love my car, but I’m not looking forward to retrieving it.  When I move, I won’t have to drive.  I will be able to, but I hate driving, so I doubt I will much.  Knowing me, I’ll use GPS to go everywhere until I feel comfortable driving there.  Then I’ll use public transportation as much as possible, and get rides from my aide when it’s not feasible.  I want to lower my carbon footprint.  Living in a largish city should have that result.  In South Dakota, having a car is necessary.  We drive everywhere, but we also consider greater distances as “within driving range”.  We can drive across town in 30 minutes, but we think nothing of driving 4 hours to Minneapolis or Omaha to shop or see a show.  Anything under 5 hours is fair game for a day trip.

I’ve done day trips to Minneapolis, Des Moines, and Omaha.  It’s not that we don’t have things to do here.  It’s just that there are a lot more things you can do in the twin cities.  It can make for a long day, though.  I’m glad to be home.  I missed my pillow.  And my stuff.  I got gift cards to Puzzle Warehouse, which is my favorite place to buy puzzles.  Much better this way, as I get to choose which ones I want, and no doubles.  I also got a lifetime supply of candy.  Maybe not lifetime, but lots!  My nephews loved the gifts I got them.  A drone with printed out instructions to register it.  And for my other nephew, a PS4 the Darth Vader edition and some games.  Rock Band 4, and a few others.

My sister has sent me 3 texts so far today.  She wasn’t with us this time.  I thanked her for the guitar.  It’s not as heavy as I thought.  I’m holding off on playing with it today.  I’m just relaxing and reassuring my cat today.  I think it’s awesome that weed had such a positive effect for me.  I wrote down the names of the strains I liked, and will be using it again when I move there.  I’m seeing that it’s not something I’ll need to do every day, as the lingering effects are still working for me now.  Maybe a few times a week.  It doesn’t take much, either.  It was a hybrid that worked best for me.  Called Blue Dream.  There are several dispensaries that have that strain in Denver, so that’s good.  I’m off to read.

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